The Six Million Dollar Man S1:03

Episode: Operation Firefly
Original Airdate: 02/01/1974

Happy Sunday! Today we have a special surprise for you. After finding a slice of success overseas, I am pleased to announce that we have a second host joining us today (and from here on out) to parse out these episodes of everyone’s favorite cyborg! Damian from Damian Thomas Films Etc is here to get in on the fun and to get swingin’ in the 70s! HUZZAH and THREE CHEERS! Jolly good, Old Cock and all of that!! Let’s see what happens! (P.S. Damian also goes by “Scoot”)

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SCOOT: Pip pip, old bean and shiver me timbers. Damn, I went all pirate again, I’m just not cut out for this whole being English nonesense. Anyway, thanks for such a sexy introduction and letting me join you on this magical quest of 70’s wonderment. Of course, this show isn’t as good as The Prisoner, The New Avengers, Terry & June, or any other good old British show for that matter, but yeah, let’s have a gander at what’s going on then…

EI: Steve and Austin are in a lab! They put on their safety goggles!! Oscar initiates a laser!!! The technology!!! “What is it, Oscar, old pal??” “Sustainable energy, old sock.” Oscar replies. “Enough to power the entire world.” “Holy BEEEEEEEEEEP!!” Steve replies as deadpan as he can. “There’s a problem though,” says Oscar, wiping Steve’s spit off of his goggles. “The only man who can work this has been kidnapped and we need you to go get him.” “OK, chum.” Austin acknowledges. “Where is he?” “That’s the thing, see, pal. We don’t know. But his daughter has ESP so she can tell you where he is.” “OK, gotcha.”

SCOOT: Steve has just basically fallen in love with a laser, I think the cyborg in him is starting to infiltrate his brain. So this Oscar fella shows Steve a picture of ESP girl and guess what… She’s fairly attractive. I’m thinking we’ve just met Austin’s love interest for this episode. Oh dear, a baddie has overheard their conversation and it looks like he’s pretty interested in ESP girl too. How did he sneak a listening device into Austin headquarters again?

EI: Steve hightails it to Mexico (or Aruba or The Bahamas) and finds the daughter like clockwork. She’s not interested in his schtick so he uses his bionic arm to play the guitar as fast as he can. Later he uses his bionic eye to spot an assassin in the distance and we get the first eheh eheh eheh sound when he uses his mechanical parts. even later he uses his bionic legs to stop a runaway taxi and his bionic arm to whittle a canoe out of a tree in less than a minute!!

SCOOT: That’s Spain mate, it’s in Europe, which is like America, but the people are slightly better at golf. So ESP daughter’s playing hard to get, that’s just playing into Austin’s hands. Talking of Austin’s hands, I have some slight problems with the guitar scene. How exactly did the pitch get higher? All he did was start playing faster, surely the notes would have stayed the same. I guess I’m over thinking this. My favourite sequence was in the Everglades where Steve attacks the bad guys with a massive bit of wood, then the boat explodes which makes him do a funky jump back, and then when he tells ESP girl that the guide’s been shot dead, she’s all “what we gonna do now without a guide?” Talk about heartless!

Oh, and Steve Austin wrestling with a growling rubber alligator…

EI: Murder! Assassins! Moustaches and lasers!! Canoes, alligators and espionage all right here – in episode three: Operation Firefly.

SCOOTBring on the next one!!!

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